Rebound Rituals: Fifty Ways to Bounce Back After Breaking Up

Ok, ladies and gents: brothers and sistahs: Today's post is a little whimsical but nevertheless important and critical information to share.

While it doesn't rate very highly in the discourse on global warming and it would definitely be inappropriate talking about instead of world hunger. Yet the sudden termination, dismissal, removal, severing, fracturing, disembodiment, imploding, exploding, of a romantic relationship is not only news worthy in ones personal life even though it would not make headlines unless you were Ken and Brittany, Brad and Angelina or Russell Simmons and Kimora. But it can be so devastating that even global warming and world hunger sometimes grind to a halt while folks mend their broken hearts so they can get back to the business and work of healing the world.

Most of us have survived our share of breakups and could probably write a book or two or three ourselves. So, I dedicate this post to those who know the pain of beakup. I borrow the words of Kerry Colburn and Jennifer Worick, authors of Rebound Rituals: 50 Ways to Bounce Back After Breaking Up, "to those who have weathered a broken heart - may your recovery be swift and your new life glorious!"

I will just indulge you with a few of my random selections from Kerry and Jennifer:

Seduce Yourself - Next Saturday night, take yourself out to dinner and a movie. Buy yourself a huge bouquet of flowers and a box of your favorite candy. Gaze at your bodacious bod in the mirror and tell yourself how frekin' hot you are. Narcissism isn't always such a bad thing.

Stalk a New Guy or Girl - When you get the urge to drive by your ex's house or business, why not do a little recon and follow a new cutie instead? Google him/her, find an excuse to drop by her/his office, or take pains to be at the gym, cafe, or watering hole when you know he/she will be there.

Ex-orcism - to perform an ex-ordism, recite a freedom chant as you burn something of his/hers. You can make up your own chant or use our simple but effective poem to banish him/her forever:

I'm done with you
I'm finally free
God knows how much happier
I'm going to be!

Now shimmy and dance your victory dance!

Draft a mission statement - What do you want, no require, from your next relationship? Jot everything down in a personal mission statement. Declare what you will bring to the table and detail what you will embrace, accept, and refuse from the next girl/guy. Is it necessary that he/she rub your feet on a weekly basis? Want to have kids someday? Love teenage dramas on the WB? Bring you food when you're under the weather? Write it all down. then, like Jerry Maguire, make 50 copies in the middle of the night and send it to all your girlfriends/boyfriends so they can hold you to your credo in the light of day.

Finally, Fly solo! Have you always wanted to see Paris or South Africa? Would you love to take a cooking class in Tuscany or a jewelry making class in Taos, NM? or go sky diving in the California desert? Did you go to the Rose Bowl game with your ex when you really wanted to see the Great Barrier Reef? Now is the time to take a trip that's all about you. Celebrate your single status by going exactly where you want to go, and traveling at your own pace. You'll relish your freedom, meet interesting people along the way, and remind yourself that you can do anything you want to do - all by yourself.

If a major vacation isn't in the cards right now, check the Web for low low fares and take off for a long weekend. Whether it's Montreal for $209 or Miami for $89, pick your destination, throw a red bra, a pair of Jackie O sunglasses in a tote, and fly solo. Do it now! If you are a guy recovering from a breakup - buy yourself a pair of thong underwear if you usually wear boxers. If you already wear thongs then go au natural! Get your shades, a sexy shirt and head into the sunset for an adventure!

Get ready to make yourself number one again! Know that love is out there somewhere looking for you. So enjoy the in between time as much as the love and passion times. It is all part of the cycle of life.

Blessings! Qiyamah A. Rahman
ps Buy a copy or two of the book for your friends. Inevitably someone you know will need it. Also, I didn't share the really wicked ones because I know that some of you already have fiendish minds and can easily go there! Be gentle with yourselves and continue to love yourselves!